Teacher Trainee T-Shirts

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

A Puppet Named Juan

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

'I was a junior doctor when I started this shift.'

'Is that enough peace on earth, Miss? I've got my tuba lesson in ten minutes and kickboxing at six...'

Orthopedics. Pediatrics. Stuff they never taught your in nursing school.

"While your lesson plans were perfect, and your bulletin boards were terrific...your classroom management skills need work!"

'If you can control your emotions I will make you a branch manager. Yippee.'

The Ideal Teacher.

Manager reading The Little Trainee That Could: 'I think I can, I think I can...'

'No, Johnny - first you punch the airholes, and then you put in the hamster!'

"Don't get your hopes up, Filby."

'You must be the new hire. Welcome aboard. Here's our prepackaged curriculum. If time permits, encourage critical thinking.'

NHS application system: 'Let me in! I'm a Junior Doctor!'

'Virtual patient.'

Teacher appreciation then...and teacher appreciation now.

STRIP Hambone: Training wheels on a computer

"It's not for soaking your feet. . . it's a bed pan."

'He still hasn't got the hang of it.'

"Oh, don't worry. Typical beginner's mistake."

"I know you're new to the job, Ms. Jones, but the correct term is 'stat'... not 'move your ass'!"

'Sorry, kid...that's it.'

Survey says there are still a quarter of trainee GPs to stay in full-time clinical work

"Nothing beats the thrill of operating beyond one's competence."

Teacher.

'Yeah, I've got the new guy working on table wines. He seems to be getting the hang of it.'

"Trainee Baristas Queue Here"

Do as many study days as you can

'Our clientele is middle class; you know, your average Joe-750ml.'

He's working his way up to lions!

'Or there's a budget treatment with one of our trainees...'

"It's quite obvious that you're not a team player."

"Everybody, this is Scott...my management trainee."

"But the good news is that if you get a life threatening illness...then you'd get a decent payout."