Tax Tension Reliever Gifts

'Well, I hope you're satisfied -- I spent all afternoon going over your return, and I can't find a thing wrong with it!'

"Can an investment vehicle save you money?"

Milking small business.

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'Tax.'

'Watch what you admit to. He once tried to fine one of my clients for looking a gift horse in the mouth.'

"What if my inner demons want to write about bunnies?"

"It was Socrates, wasn't it, who said, 'The unexamined life is not worth living'?"

'I'd like the short form instead...'

"Whisky? Have you got anything stronger?"

"I can't stop thinking about all those available parking spaces back on West Eighty-fifth Street."

Romney Tax Desk: Accounts Receivable...Accounts Believable.

'By the way, no one has ever beaten me and lived to tell about it.'

"The I.R.S. can't hurt him anymore."

'Dad's saying he controls my allowance because of something called the Commerce Clause.'

Tax grab.

"Now are you convinced that the tax simplification plan will work?"

"Can they tell I cheated on my taxes?"

IRS. Can I check off a dollar to be used against candidates for public office?

tax rises...

You're doing "taxes", huh? What's your high score?

"My accountant said it was a great write off."

'I've been paying taxes for 63 years, and I still don't have the hang of it.'

'Isn't that nice, honey? Our money sent a postcard from the tax haven!'

He keeps us humble.

'How's the executive training program, going?'

"Sire, the auditors are in the counting house."

Dangerous tax audits.

'We'll have one long form, one short form, and one just-right form.'

'Your refund? — oh, we spent that money MONTHS ago!'

'I'm giving you the maximum punishment...I'm letting you go free to worry about taxes, inflation and everything else, just like the rest of us.'

Man's self-assessment form says: 'I'm screwed.'

Hello, Mr Babcock, this is 1983 calling.

Tax time is simply disgusting.

"Maybe it’s not the best time to mention the subpoena."