Tax Strategy Seeker Pillows

"Pssst...ever hear of a charitable remainder trust?"

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

'There's more to life than winning. There's also losing - to offset taxable capital gains.'

"So, you want your owners to write you off and treat you more like their kid?"

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

"Get someone to make the slot bigger."

"My MP ensured that there are laws which allow me to evade taxes legally. We both end up winning!"

If this carries on we're going to lose all our tax losses.

"You know what I hate about getting older? I don't have the reflexes to dodge taxes like I used to."

'We've gone through your books and we demand payment in cash.'

'A tax audit? I out sourced my books, records and book keeping to India months ago.'

The Mattress Savings Bank

'I've begun spreading my wealth to offshore accounts.'

'Keep a lid on it!'

'I'm worth more than $3,000 as a federal income tax exemption. So how about a raise in my allowance?'

'Someday, son, this will all be yours...to give to the IRS, thanks to the back taxes I owe.'

I filed my tax return electronically, to speed things up. Sure enough, I got audited in record time.

How to make sure he won't see his shadow.

'She didn't marry him for his looks or personality - she needed his debts for a tax write-off!'

'Wasn't that the Chancellor?'

'Look at it this way, if you didn't have to pay all that money in tax, you'd go out and spend it anyway.'

'Maybe we can rob Peter AND Paul.'

'Reinvent yourself. You write off the whole thing as a business expense!'

'When I was a youngster I was going to be a Rock GOD, but the allure of working with multi-denominational tax efficient offshore bonds proved too strong.'

IRS, 'Two jobs? -- Oh, the greedy type, eh?'

'There are billions and billions of dollars of unreported income. How come we don't have any of it?'

'Get me into that 15% tax bracket I've heard so much about.'

"Ah Watson, reducing your taxes was simplicity itself. They were but elementary deductions."

Small Business Advisor - Dealing with the taxman.

'There's more to life than winning; there's also taking losses as tax write-offs, That's it?'

'What would be the point to be super-rich if we're super-taxed?'

'Your money? — does it or does it not have 'United States Treasury' printed on it?

"Since I never actually go to the gym, can I deduct the membership fees as a charitable contribution?"