Tax Shelter Tactician Gifts

'Come at me as if you're trying to take away my tax shelters.'

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

'There's more to life than winning. There's also losing - to offset taxable capital gains.'

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

"Marions nous! Tu payes les impôts, j'offre le resto!"

Fortune cookies based on various business magazines.

"So, you want your owners to write you off and treat you more like their kid?"

"I can't imagine how things could get any worse."

'Hang on, I've just found another one. It must've fallen down behind the coffee machine.'

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

"My MP ensured that there are laws which allow me to evade taxes legally. We both end up winning!"

'Don't come too close - this baby will tear you to pieces, bite your head off and drink your blood... I've called him 'Fiscal Policy'.'

'I've got the world by the tail. How much is this going to set me back?'

'How do you expect the Government to bail you out of your financial crisis if you don't pay your taxes?'

'I load on the job all the time so I figure it's not really 'earned' income.'

Offshore tax havens.

'I move we go on record for fewer imports here and more imports there!'

'Will you bring in Mr.Harris' file - you'll find it under 'U' for unbelievable.'

If this carries on we're going to lose all our tax losses.

"You know what I hate about getting older? I don't have the reflexes to dodge taxes like I used to."

'A tax audit? I out sourced my books, records and book keeping to India months ago.'

'We've gone through your books and we demand payment in cash.'

"Leak to the press: Brussels bail-outs are French currency manipulation, costing British bureaucrats' jobs!"

'Well, well. You made more money last year than you did the year before -- You people never learn, do you?'

"Today workers in socialistic economies sought private sector solutions. Workers in predominantly private sector economies want more socialism."

A safe is about to fall on an unsuspecting man interested in risk-free investments.

"It's written in invisible ink."

'Keep a lid on it!'

'The Buck (after taxes) Stops Here.'

Osbourne plans for another 'Giveaway' Budget

'I'm worth more than $3,000 as a federal income tax exemption. So how about a raise in my allowance?'

"We got a report that you're rolling in dough."

'While I'm here for my audit, could I interest you in some tax free municipal bonds?'