Tax Season Trickster T-Shirts

"Do you want to do that hilarious thing where we read the itemized deductions and then say 'in bed'?"

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

Is this your idea of a joke, Findlay...?

"My accountant is brilliant - he has just had a loophole names after him!"

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

'In this class you will learn to apply the talents of creative writing to accounting.'

I've found a loophole in your loophole

"It only made sense for us to finally merge."

Dr. Kapuchnik, I feel like there are powerful, sinister, unseen forces conspiring to do me harm, even though I haven't done anything wrong. Does this condition have a name? It's called April 15th, Al. Tax day.

"For this job, we require someone with excellent multi-taxing skills."

The IRS emptied my pouch.

"I can't imagine how things could get any worse."

'Right now I'm counting the blessings that we owe to Uncle Sam.'

"About your tax refund—would you like to donate it to help pay off the national debt?"

IRS, 'It might make you feel better if you just think of it as a negative entitlement.'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

'Oh no! It's VAT man!'

'Life, liberty & the pursuit of tax shelters.'

"These are all my financial papers - with the exception of the codes to my secret Swiss bank accounts, of course."

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

"It's part of a deal I worked out with the I.R.S."

Panama Papers Scandal

New For Halloween! Sexy C.P.A.

'I called you in here because your expenses and contributions appear to be quite elaborate!'

'I'd like to think they contribute because it's the right thing to do, but I'm not above a short sermon on tax deductibility.'

The Red-Light Accounting District

'You won't feel a thing. We make a small incision in your wallet and...'

"For my will I decided to cut out the middle man and bequeath all my money to the IRS."

'It's tax avoidance crackdown avoidance.'

'By proposing a merger instead of marriage, we can deduct this meal as a business expense.'

Money laundering.

'I wonder if I can declare you as dependents on my income taxes?'

'She didn't marry him for his looks or personality - she needed his debts for a tax write-off!'