Tax Optimization Pillows

IRS, 'Yes, but in order to deduct it, you have to be a LICENSED wine-taster.'

'Progress of a bookshelf'

'Forget the DaVinci Code! I'm still trying to crack the tax code!'

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

'There's more to life than winning. There's also losing - to offset taxable capital gains.'

'He's refusing to die as a protest against Inheritance Tax.'

"How is the budget forecast looking?"

'Honestly Bob, it's not that bad. If you can make as much next year as you did this year you'll be able to pay off your outstanding taxes for last year. That'll just leave the interest, the tax for this year and... my fees.'

'Congratulations! You're the proud father of three healthy, bouncing tax deductions!'

'Would you do me the honour of becoming tax advantaged with me?'

Fortune cookies based on various business magazines.

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

"So, you want your owners to write you off and treat you more like their kid?"

'Don't worry! Since 28% of my salary goes to the government, I've decided to work 72% of the time!'

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

"Well, I'm sorry. The 3 wishes I'm granting can't exceed the annual exclusion of $14,000."

'... And I appreciate that you've 'saved the world from certain doom on numerous occasions', but you still have to pay your taxes.'

'I've got the world by the tail. How much is this going to set me back?'

"My MP ensured that there are laws which allow me to evade taxes legally. We both end up winning!"

'We don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's a tax deduction.'

'Life, liberty & the pursuit of tax shelters.'

If this carries on we're going to lose all our tax losses.

"You know what I hate about getting older? I don't have the reflexes to dodge taxes like I used to."

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

'Keep a lid on it!'

The Mattress Savings Bank

Corporations will have to earn this tax cut one dollar at a time!

'I've begun spreading my wealth to offshore accounts.'

06 Congressional Record.

'A tax audit? I out sourced my books, records and book keeping to India months ago.'

'You Americans call it 'Illegal Tax Evasion'? Well, here in Europe, we call it 'Monaco Effect Investments''!

'I'm here about the tax credits for business equipment which you listed in your return as 'Betty', 'Mabel', 'Liz'...'

'I've invested my heart and soul in this company. I need a receipt for tax purposes.'

'I'm worth more than $3,000 as a federal income tax exemption. So how about a raise in my allowance?'