Tax Nerds Pillows

"Experts agree - we need a tax increase."

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

The Current Separation of Church and State Explained.

'I suppose we've got to keep a sense of perspective. The Greeks waste our money, the French merely spend it.'

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

'How's daddy's little deductions doing?'

"You may think the government is a big 'Giveaway' program, but you can't deduct your tax as a charitable contribution."

'Do you, John, accept a married tax allowance with Sandra ?'

You want an extension? Good heavens, man, we haven't even paid for Reagans boondoggles yet!

"Don't you think we should wait to see the effects of the new tax code?"

IRS, 'It might make you feel better if you just think of it as a negative entitlement.'

Footing The Bill

"It's no use, Super Rich! Your labyrinthine, yet entirely legal tax structures are too powerful for me!"

Congressional Budget Committee: Benefactor...Victim

'So, they weren't interested in your Robin Hood tax then.'

'Okay... now everyone smile and say: 'that;s not deductible'.'

'Aluminum siding will be used to cut costs in restoration at the U.S. Capitol.'

'Wouldn't it be easier if the banks simply merged with the Inland Revenue?'

New Improved I.R.S.

"There's no business deductions like show business deductions."

Osborne's Tax Cuts

"Our accountant is great. We were a C corp, but now we're a B- corp."

Romney: 'Corporations are people! We just pay a lot less taxes than you!'

'You Americans call it 'Illegal Tax Evasion'? Well, here in Europe, we call it 'Monaco Effect Investments''!

'I was all ready to deal with the military, but I never expected an IRS coup!'

"I realize how helpless and needy they are, but I'm afraid you still can't claim a human as a dependent."

Stimulus bust

'I sent my mother to jail. I work for the IRS.'

"I now represent both death and taxes."

Our 4 Branches of Government

'We're all wearing them - they were a gift from Warren Buffett.'

"Sure they love us, but once we turn 18 and are no longer a tax deduction, they'll tell us to move out!"