Tax-evading Wizards Pillows

"Well, a million dollars isn't worth much these days ... unless you can get rid of the Internal Revenue Service!"

Is this your idea of a joke, Findlay...?

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

'Don't worry! Since 28% of my salary goes to the government, I've decided to work 72% of the time!'

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

'... And I appreciate that you've 'saved the world from certain doom on numerous occasions', but you still have to pay your taxes.'

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

Do you want this set of books, or the set you keep in the broom cupboard?

'I'm here about the tax credits for business equipment which you listed in your return as 'Betty', 'Mabel', 'Liz'...'

"For my will I decided to cut out the middle man and bequeath all my money to the IRS."

Little Taxes.

"Never go to a church during a hurricane. They only provide shelter from taxes."

"We invested everything we had in our marriage."

"My bill isn't terribly controversial. It would provide modest tax breaks for people who don't really need them."

'First the good news - we don't have to pay any corporate taxes this year.'

Put it through as an expense! Nobody's going to check, are they?

'That was devious and despicable... keep up the good work.'

'Instead of a medal, could you just give me a tax cut?'

It's 10 pm. Do you know where your tax loopholes are?

"Yes, a lot of peple say that I remind them of Christopher Lee"

"Let's make a deal. . . I won't audit you in exchange for a discount on one of your Warhols."

And why are you enrolling in an accounting course? Well, one day...I hope to get a loophole named after me.

'Please enter the amount owed here...use an extra sheet of paper if required.'

"Sorry for keeping you sweating, I'm putting you through now."

'Owner's kid. Gets paid under the table.'

'Remember I said I wish I had more arms so I could get more things done? Well the doctor took care of that problem.'

IRS: 'Life isn't fair.' - John F. Kennedy

'I would donate to your charity, but it could draw the governments attention to me.'

'I'm afraid you're going to have to reveal the exact extent of your economic clout, Mr. Fletcher.'

'Everything I hide from the IRS I do it for the children.'

Actually, I was looking for a tax haven.

I.R.S. tax office with man sitting in front of agent's desk looking at RECOVERY & SCREAM ROOM door.

"Good luck getting my client's tax returns - he never even filed!"

Duty Free Closed to Public

"It's New York. It wants you back."