Tax Confusion Adventurer Pillows

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

'How's daddy's little deductions doing?'

"You may think the government is a big 'Giveaway' program, but you can't deduct your tax as a charitable contribution."

"Don't you think we should wait to see the effects of the new tax code?"

Congressional Budget Committee: Benefactor...Victim

"It's no use, Super Rich! Your labyrinthine, yet entirely legal tax structures are too powerful for me!"

'So, they weren't interested in your Robin Hood tax then.'

'Which scares you most - Iran, North Korea, or the alternative minimum tax?'

'Okay... now everyone smile and say: 'that;s not deductible'.'

'Aluminum siding will be used to cut costs in restoration at the U.S. Capitol.'

New Improved I.R.S.

Osborne's Tax Cuts

'Wouldn't it be easier if the banks simply merged with the Inland Revenue?'

"I realize how helpless and needy they are, but I'm afraid you still can't claim a human as a dependent."

'I'd like to think they contribute because it's the right thing to do, but I'm not above a short sermon on tax deductibility.'

'I sent my mother to jail. I work for the IRS.'

'Then he smiled and his very last words were 'Now the inland revenue will never find out!''

'We're all wearing them - they were a gift from Warren Buffett.'

'I'm not experienced, but I have a PhD in Byzantine history.'

Basic Tax Law/Loopholes.

'Right you've got 30 minutes...start squeezing.'

'Of course, we could drop the enquiry and agree to henceforth leave each other alone.'

"Tell the press direct EU-taxation is necessary..."

Ever sensitive about its image, the IRS tries a more service-oriented approach.

'Is it true that you people give tax breaks for minority-owned businesses?'

'Stick a few upper-class tax cuts to it and it'll pass like a bran muffin dipped in vaseline.'

'Grible is a fiscal conservative. You know — 'if it ain't broke, don't subsidize it.''

"Here's a new one, intellectual property tax."

'I'm afraid, Mr.Siimkins, that you have been badly advised - Birmingham is NOT a tax haven. . .'

"Remember, report itemized deductions on Schedule A on your federal form 1040."

Fiscal Cliff Dwellers.