Tax Bracket Detective Gifts

"Let's eat lunch in the park and play 'Guess that Stranger's Tax Bracket.'"

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"I'm as progressive as they come, except for my money. No one touches my money."

Flat tax - equal burden?

'Would you do me the honour of becoming tax advantaged with me?'

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

'How's daddy's little deductions doing?'

"You may think the government is a big 'Giveaway' program, but you can't deduct your tax as a charitable contribution."

"It's no use, Super Rich! Your labyrinthine, yet entirely legal tax structures are too powerful for me!"

Congressional Budget Committee: Benefactor...Victim

'So, they weren't interested in your Robin Hood tax then.'

IRS agent to professor scrutinizing tax return under microscope: 'Still looking for that tax loophole, professor?'

"Don't you think we should wait to see the effects of the new tax code?"

'Okay... now everyone smile and say: 'that;s not deductible'.'

'Aluminum siding will be used to cut costs in restoration at the U.S. Capitol.'

Osborne's Tax Cuts

New Improved I.R.S.

'Wouldn't it be easier if the banks simply merged with the Inland Revenue?'

'We're all wearing them - they were a gift from Warren Buffett.'

'I sent my mother to jail. I work for the IRS.'

"I realize how helpless and needy they are, but I'm afraid you still can't claim a human as a dependent."

'I'd like to think they contribute because it's the right thing to do, but I'm not above a short sermon on tax deductibility.'

Basic Tax Law/Loopholes.

'Right you've got 30 minutes...start squeezing.'

'Of course, we could drop the enquiry and agree to henceforth leave each other alone.'

"Tell the press direct EU-taxation is necessary..."

Ever sensitive about its image, the IRS tries a more service-oriented approach.

'Only one thing could be worse than paying income tax...' '..Not having to pay it.'

"Found meat is income."

'Stick a few upper-class tax cuts to it and it'll pass like a bran muffin dipped in vaseline.'

'Is it true that you people give tax breaks for minority-owned businesses?'

"Nice try, Mr. Willis, but it won't make any difference."

'Grible is a fiscal conservative. You know — 'if it ain't broke, don't subsidize it.''

Fiscal Cliff Dwellers.