Tavern Trailblazer Gifts

Joe's Bar - We sell no wine before it's opening time!

The experienced backpacker.

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

'It's not easy being ahead of your time.'

Overworked in the office

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

Hither and Yon sign

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

"Trail mix?"

"Don't even think about it."

Ski Slope Rated Black Due To Wall At The Bottom

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

"I'll get my 10,000 steps in tonight!"

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

"I love the things I say when I’m in nature."

Women in a cross country race

Wherever the Trail Leads. . .

We need to see him because there's no satellite-based system to guide us on a trip down the path to enlightenment.

"I accidentally shredded an important document, so I'm trying to piece it back together. It should only take a few years."

"Take a right at Rocky's fire hydrant. A left at Duke's bench and the dog part will be one block past buddy's tree."

'No, this is not Mel's secretary. This is Mel.'

'Y'know, this wouldn't keep happening if you learned to load your pack properly.'

'I don't know what he's doing or why he's doing it, but by golly, I love his work ethic.'

"What happened to the good old Jewish holidays when all we used to do was eat?"

"Stop whimpering. Most dogs would kill for a walk like this."

Bear Signpost.

"Hungry? I'm ravenous, Norman, I could murder a lentil cutlet."

"Just to be clear, this is a hike, not a ‘walk.’"

Glass Ceiling

National Park Map

Nearest Backache Specialist.

"Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!"

Man with twisted legs using a twisted walking stick.