Taste Testers Gifts

Meat. No, I have no idea what the heck you just shoved in your mouth, I'm giving away toothpicks. Free samples.

'Women cook to feed the soul...men cook to feed the ego.'

'Apparently, my wine-tasting computer liked the '86 Haut Brion a bit too much - it didn't leave any for us.'

"Sorry, but the box does taste better."

Bad for you but to die for

'Eight years old, huh? If it's so good, why didn't somebody drink it eight years ago?'

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Harsh Mellows.

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

"Now, in contrast to the last olive oil you tasted, this one is infused with sixty-five more dollars."

"Your meal sounded nice."

"They won't even try their palate cleansers!"

And then in Italy. . . "But I really don't like bubblegum gelato."

Wine Tasting and Wine Guzzling

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

Cereal Tasting.

"For the first half hour, I was, like, really there. Enchanted. But I found the wild-quail confit so disappointing that not even the fig reduction on the poached pear could get me back."

Avocado Timeline

Ethnic food springing out of a menu.

"Ah — excellent catsup."

Real coffee vs usual vending machine stuff

"More?"

'Here ya' go, sweetie. Our Key Lime Pie.'

Big Burgers.

'...or, if you're watching your cholesterol, we also have thousand-year-old egg substitutes.'

'Why do my parents have to be professional chefs?!'

'I'd recommend the white wine.'

Chef swatting flies into a bowl in a sushi bar.

"Do you know our soup is world renowned?"

"Jeffrey eats everything, Mom, because no one has told him what he doesn't like."

'This sugar substitute is perfect except for one thing. It's salty.'

"I am listening to my body. My body says yuk!"

Dijon Vu

"It's all good – but some of it is better."

"Robust, full-bodied bouquet with just a hint of bitter, mean-spirited despair."