Talk Radio Enthusiast Pillows

It's the Dr. Sadie Advice Hour. "John Smith" in Hollywood, you're on. What's your problem?! House of Java.net Cybercafe. If I cooked a ... cake ... and then hackers got mad and broke into my system and caused havoc, and so I withdrew the ... cake ... from the market, how could I regain my image as a bold ... cake ...maker? Is "John Smith" your real name?! A bold ... cake ... maker would use his real name. Your show doesn't air in North Korea, does it?

"It's the Dr. Sadie Advice Hour. For the next two hours, I'll be taking your calls."

Clement Freud

"Because he's been corrupted by talk radio."

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

Dog FM. (Man blowing dog whistle into radio microphone).

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

"Did you hear Sadie's show today?"

"When did you first notice you were larger than life?"

Dr. Kapuchnik, I notice that you've been quoting Dr. Phil a lot lately. That's because I'm hoping that if he sees me sucking up to him in the comics, he'll bankroll the TV-show proposal I sent to his production company, Gasbag Enterprises.

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

'I'm Bored'

"See! Thousands of new listeners."

How to get on talk shows by promoting your new book

It's the Ask Sadie Advice Hour. For the next two hours, I'll be taking your calls. I'll tell you how to fix your hopeless relationship or cope with all the people at work who really are better than you. Then I'll berate you for not manning up and dealing with it on your own instead of bugging me about it! Los Angeles, CA, you're on. What's your problem? Click.

"You're on 'Ask Sadie.' What's your problem?!"

'I think I've found what's causing the radio's funny buzzing sound.'

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, I am 62 years old and was fired from my job of 22 years just before xmas 2010. What should I do? Sincerely, Irene. Attack! Stop! Enough, Sadie. Haven't you been listening? The mean-spirited, virulent partisanship of talk show hosts must end. People were hurt and some died. Aren't you the ultimate partisan, you coot? That's different lady! Fasten your seatbelts.

Jerry Springer

The Great Larrynx

Feelings towards radios #2 Picket signs with pictures of radios on them

'I wish someone would finally make that Oprah Winfrey shush! I would but I can't find the remote.'

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

Orca Winfrey interviews Meghan Mackerel.

Randi Rhodes

'We've been picking up your radio broadcasts- You must be Fibber McGee and Molly'

'When did YOU switch to a talk format?'

'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'

'Actually, I haven't written it yet, I'm doing the promotional tour first, to see if being an author is the right career move for me!'

Shirker ant.