Talent Show Viewer Mugs

Trump commissions song

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

The Drummer

'... And I'd like to thank my agent and everyone who voted for me... '

"I'm a TV producer. I can get you on one of those fake judge programs, and you'll both become famous."

"This could be fun! Don't you do magic tricks, Cruz?"

Executives are evaluated in Dancing With The Stars style.

The Ox Factor

'That should be an easy act to follow.'

"This next song is for all the music teachers who said I'd never make it."

'Thank you! This next song I wrote to prove that we accountants DO know how to be 'cool'.'

Well, it's not my fault if nobody bothered to tune the microphone.'

'Usual Saturday night crap.'

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

'...and all going well, definitely no more than 15 minutes of fame!'

'You call that carol singing?'

Eh... yes Mister eh... Genghis. Can I just ask where did you get your boots?

"Oh heck, it’s going to be a long night, someone’s pressed the golden buzzer."

"She's good because she is our bookkeeper."

'Sorry, I already have a Dancer.'

The ocean is no place for a star.

'I'm gifted but I hide it well.'

Jerusalem's Got Talent