Tackle Collector Pillows

Fishermen dread the spot where the lures hang heavy from the trees like Spanish moss.

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

'Yeah, yeah, yeah... I know the drill.'

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

Al's Farm Equipment: Our Prices Can't Be Beat!

'You know, there's no need to reinvent the rock.'

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

Pun on Excalibur - Swiss Army knife appears from the lake.

Football.

'Would it have killed you to go with a store-bought model?'

'It's my latest invention -- I cal lit 'a rock tied to a stick.''

'My hubby is getting better at D.I.Y. . . . Oh yes, he now spends more on screws than plasters.'

'We thought you'd like music during your building inspection.'

The Black Hole the National Observatory just discovered, where temporarily misplaced tools and parts go.

"I guess I always wanted to be an electrician. As a little boy, I ran away to join the circuits."

Hooks R Us.

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 2

'I'm sorry Rex, but since getting this new stick for Christmas, I have no further need for you.'

DIY Store "I don't know why we come here..."

Fish to angler: 'Nice try, pal, but I know plastic and feathers when I see them!'

"If, in the future, you're unclear about what I need you to gather when I say nuts ..."

"For only five dollars more, the guy let me have the 'Smart Hammer.'"

"The applications are limitless."

'This is the spot that Tackle Dealer told us to try.'

"I think you might need a few more tools."

Secateurs/Non-Secateurs.

'Made your point.'

'Quick! Play dead!'

'I hate it when they use invisible line.'

'Hurry, hurry! What's he saying?'

"Sure, it's an artificial fish. I caught it with artificial bait."

"Well I thought it was obvious I would be charging a finders fee"

Updated Fables. The Ant And The Grasshopper … And The Mosquito. IRS.

"Good news, you are virus free and should be able to resume hitting each other in the heads as hard as possible this fall."

The Carrot and Stick.