Tabloid Detective Prints

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

A man is tied to a chair and forced to watch TV news.

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

Journalism student ponders which course he wants to major in.

BREAKING FAKE NEWS

"Screw this—I'm going to work for the tabloids."

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"Some idiot spread the rumour that the boss had called in sick! Now look what's happened to the tobacco and coffee stocks!"

JET (Part I)

"And remember, people, it's better to light a scandal than to curse the darkness!"

Home Business - Newspaper Ad.

'I want to sue my veterinarian. He didn't keep doctorpatient confidentiality and blabbed about my sex change operation to the tabloids.'

The Original Gossip Columns

"I try to keep my classes relevant."

'I heard it through the grapevine.'

'Inflated gloom!'

Gossip columns: 'And rumour has it that singer, Kelli B is said to be in shock after finding out longtime boyfriend, actor Todd Korfull, has been having an affair with, now get this, KELLI'S agent!! YEEOUCH!...' A column talking

Inventor of wheel and discoverer of fire seen on date! More (arrow). The first tabloid.

'Read ALL about IT! In other less TRASHIER Newspapers!'

"Do I have to answer that? I wanted to sell all this stuff to the tabloids!"

Leisure Editor

Comparing the headlines of three different New York based newspapers.

Welcome to celebrity hell.

The Hypocritic Oath

'Oh great, now, not only am I cursed, but my photo is on the front page of the tabloids...'

'Normally I don't like a newspaper because of its pictures.'

Man to other: 'You don't really know what it's like until you've walked a mile in another man's scandal.'

'I think it means corporate control is now complete.'

"Quick - make something up, I've got a space to fill."

Turn on the news. I will not comply. My analysis of your viewing patterns has determined you will grow depressed after the lead story. There is a 95% probability you will then gorge yourself on Rocky Road ice cream and then stay up all night googling elliptical machines and diet pills. Who told you this? Both your refrigerator and your browser are gossipy.

Topless Newsreader - "Just for the first few weeks love, until we've captured the audience."

In Plain Sight

'Okay, the print media convicted you...but trust me, the video media will overturn the verdict.'

Charlie Sheen

"The school newspaper's much improved as a tabloid!"