System Fixer Prints

"Have you tried switching it off and switching it back on again - or pretending there's absolutely nothing wrong with it?"

'That's one way to 'shut down' the system...'

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

"It's not just him. The whole system's down."

"I take it the toilet is fixed?"

"Fido's determined to find that bone."

Computer operator welding machine.

Not all service desk staff were pleased about the new bring your own device policy

Does it spark joy?

'Dad, perhaps the fan should suck instead of blow?'

System failure - calling for sysadmin...

'I told him over and over again never to press 'delete' more than twice!'

'Bob will be with you in a moment. He's cleaning the filter to the wine-aroma-judging-device attached to his face.'

Cyber disease.

Justice Imbalance

Crony Capitalism (Always Follow the Money Trail)

"It's quite alright searching for the perfect phone. But remember there always will be upgrades."

'Try rebooting.'

Marriage counselor clients: 'Always right,,,never wrong'

'Is the drain still clogged, Henry?'

'Hello, Biggo Farm Equipment? How much longer is it going to take to get my manure spreader fixed?'

Hospital - Guide to wars: NHS Offensive, Battle for NHS, Fight against closures.

"Dad, my doorknob broke...can you fix it?"

'Freezer is on the blink.'

To continue with tech support, you must be in front of your computer and have a soldering iron, a voltmeter and a circuit tester available.

Leaking washing machine.

'Look, Doctor. I just want him cured. I'm not interested in what's wrong with him, so skip the lab work."

'I don't think we could throw the baby out with the bathwater if we tried.'

'When you're done fixing the furnace, could you gather up these Demons From Hell that escaped?'

"Spray me.""Trim me.""Prune me.""Mow me.""Weed me.""Fix me.""Paint me."