Synod Enthusiasts Pillows

'To avoid possible schism, a period of careful reflection is needed before changing the light-bulb.'

"It's going to be huge! Cheese-flavored vodka!"

"I don't have any opinions, and my wife things whatever Oprah thinks,."

Coca-Cola Inc: 'Gentlemen, is it too late to be bailed out for 'NEW' Coke?'

Vodka

Today's Sermon: We come into this world with nothing and we leave with nothing. Is there any chance of a bailout?

"I've been trying to apply that 'forgive and forget' principle..."

'Oh, oh! They're going to give it to us with both barrels!'

'Who cares about some stupid sex scandal? -- Let's talk about global warming!'

Sauce close to the PM.

'it's a special for nostalgia buffs.'

"Call it wishful thinking, but I don't think this peace will last. . . ."

"Like WikiLeaks has nothing better to do."

"It's O.K. to admit that the sanctions are taking their toll."

"We must root out corruption at the highest levels of government and make it look like it's happening at the lowest levels of government."

"And a source said let there be light."

'Excuse me, Mr. Pavlik, but that gentleman you called an idiot is here. Should I still say you're not in?'

Booger-Boy Scandal 4: 'I just need to craft the text well enough to shut everyone up. . . I sincerely wish they'd all shut up and go away.'

"In this plant we bottle soft drinks, Tim, not our emotions."

"I'm making an effort to limit my dependence on foreign vodka.

Industrial Disputes: the Early Years

'Please come down, Reverend Brewster -- We really DID like your sermon!'

'I have a question...am I a bird or a bee?'

Hot News.

"Sorry, I double-booked. This wouldn't happen if I had a computer - but they insist we do everything by hand."

Workers constructing barcodes

When I was a teenager, "Saturday Night live" had Mike Myers, Chris Farley, Phil Hartman

World Peace Hot Air Balloon

'Not bad - a bit preachy.'

I was going to make you a rich woman, but you're done. Fine with me. I don't care what percentage I'll get. I won't let you play with my reputation. I won't let you trade in fake scandal. Perfect. What? We got your anger on videotape. Your redemption is complete. You're back on the air. Even my head is spinning.

Snakes on a Train

The result of taking too much soda to correct acidity

"Is the vodka fresh?"

'It's Thanksgiving.. do you have any CRANBERRY VODKA?'

"You awake?"