Sustainable Savers Pillows

'The money we're saved on gas paid for Jim's leg when he tripped over the cord.'

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Investing your savings

'Greenspan said today the alert staus for the possible interest rate has been reduced from orange to yellow.'

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

Nuclear generation of energy.

'As you go through life, always remember that money isn't everything...Health benefits and stock options are also very important.'

Lemonade - $500 A Glass! 'Yes, my prices high, but how else am I supposed to buy a Boulevart M109R? Certainly not on my allowance.'

"These latest surveys are very reassuring."

Tree Funeral

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

"It failed the stress test."

"The time has come for some tough cost-cutting decisions, and I'm forced to ask myself, do we really need a bass?"

'My piggy bank charged shaking fees.'

"Good news. Your medical prognosis is right in sync with your retirement portfolio."

"Their wedding registry has 8 place settings of double wall, stainless steel water bottles."

Man breaks piggy bank to find another smaller piggy bank inside.

Reuse it or lose it.

"And this financial plan is specifically designed for people who know their retirement -- IF they get one -- won't be half as good as their parents' retirement, and are really steamed about it!"

'Doesn't bother me. All my money is in carbon-cleanup technologies.'

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

Man feeding fish banks with money, not food.

Recycle or ruin the planet?

'It may seem we're sinking deeper into debt, but really we're just experiencing a quarter of negative growth.'

'Are you good with decimals? Our certificate of deposit is currently paying 0.025%.'

New Year 2020

'But we spend all our money creating toxic waste. We were hoping someone else would figure out how to detoxify it.'

"Okay...so I could have been wrong about a few facts..."

'Damn! I was saving that for a rainy day!'

Magazines - All Special Green Issues.

'They are like family...they're my family of retirement funds.'

Nest Egg

The Mattress Savings Bank