Sustainability Comedian Pillows

Paper Bath Towels.

Striving to reduce our dependence on fossil fuels, scientists attempt to harness the energy of a toddler's tantrum.

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

'It's an extinction notice.'

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Malaprop Man, I hear you're fighting climate change now. Yes starting with solo panels, I'm reducing greenhouse guesses! I'm investing in buttery technology. I'm going to have windmeals. And of course, I've stopped drinking cola. Why is that? I'll have a smaller carbonated footprint!

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

"I didn't see the coffee table in the middle of the room, due to my visual impairment, caused by the rubbish light emitted by the government approved 150 watt energy saving bulb in my apartment..."

"Of course I care about the environment, I never throw any clothes away."

"I wouldn't take the name 'dog strangling vine' literally."

Climate Conference. I'm glad you enjoyed my speech, but please don't call it the "high-water mark."

Where's my global warming?

' I think I'm evolving due to global warming.'

"Brilliant! And then all they have to do is stop them flying at night."

This is where Brent council sends you

"He's a keen conservationist - especially where energy and water are concerned."

Oil Spill Hits Wall St.

'I'd say that our transport policy couldn't get any greener'

'So there's global warming. What possible harm could it do?'

Will work for manure.

"Hey Maurice! Take the menu, replace 'dish of the day' with 'local free range speciality' and double the price!"

We've gotten all we can with traditional drilling techniques. What do you know about fracking?

igloo smoking zone...

'It's a very common plant on earth.'

"Hide? What do you mean hide? We are literally camouflage and they still eat us!"

"How much energy did you use to create me? I wasn't awakened with nuclear power, was I?..."

'It's true! Our clothes, the curtains, the carpeting in the waiting room... they're all made out of recycled dental floss!'

"Your DNA test came back – you're 49% from the Amazon, 49% from the Caribbean, and 2% from some plastics plant in Texas."

"I'm doing my part to conserve electricity."

Global Warming.

'Gene Pool'

Earth-Friendly Financial Services: "Working to protect our planet by accumulating vast piles of your money."

'They can't help smelling like that -- they're biodegradable.'

'I promise to be the first politician to slow global warming by reducing the hot air coming out of Washigton!'

"There's no such thing as a vegan flytrap."