Survivalist At Heart T-Shirts

"No...ha-ha, no, but seriously, boy, I'm going to have to eat you now."

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

Dehydrated water...just add water.

"At least you have a tree."

Island Coffee

"With our luck, it's probably not a mirage."

Illustration from 'Robinson Crusoe'

'Don't worry -- if we run out of wood, we'll move.'

"If you tell me one more time what Gillian and the skipper would do, I'll slug you"

'Do you have internet connection?'

'I'm sorry, but I don't know where 'this is'. I, too, am a stranger here.'

'Check... weapons... maps... house-wife... clean underwear...'

Emergency Phone.

Note reads: 'In case of emergency, break bottle.'

How to survive the coming crash.

A castaway begs for money for a rescue boat

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Desert Island Meals.

'Thank-you God.'

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

'This has the makings of their toughest season ever.'

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

'I'm so bored - nothing ever happens around here!'

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

Goldfish bowl on raft...

"Hmm...I can see a best-selling book and a movie deal out of this..."

'Arf! Arf!'

'I need a life saving app. I need a life saving app.'

"Yes, I'm alone."

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

Desert Island Mishap

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

'I'm glad to see you've started building a boat.'