Survey Taking Pillows

How was your confusion experience?

'But first, a few questions about life and death.'

"d you say, 'better the devil you know,' or 'throw the rascal out' or 'other'?"

Opinion poll. I don't know if I'm politicall right or left, but everybody seems to think I'd definitely off-center.

'Can you spare a moment for the Universe, sir?'

"Just how fed up with customer services feedback are you: (a) very (b) extremely (c) incandescent with rage (d) don't ask if you value your life?"

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

Government survey into the effects of haggis throwing in Ethiopia.

'Promise me you'll say Yes / No / Don't know ...'

"Bob wait, let's do the survey first! Sir, on a scale of 1, poor, to 10, excellent, how would you rate our chase today?"

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

'Please, Ma'am — I'm running out of paper!'

"No, he's not in right now, he's out demographing."

'For? Against? Undecided? Uniformed? Apathetic? This is one accurate poll!'

I conduct comprehensive surveys - I ask my girlfriend.

"Would you have a moment to take a short survey about your experience?"

'Yes. No. Sometimes. No. No. Yes. Don't know. Sometimes. Yes. Mo.'

"A new survey shows only 3% of Americans take surveys, but everyone believes the stupid things."

"Our latest survey shows our customers basically want just three things: prompt service, and apology when mistakes occur and to be treated politely..."

First and last day as census taker...

Pollsters: Mori, Gallup and Just Nosey.

"It's ten o'clock, and seventy-seven per cent of the people think all is well!"

"Caution! Now entering the margin of error."

"Rate your experience and you could win an Amazon gift voucher."

I'm just a pollster, ma'am - I have no idea which candidate is a cat person.

"Shall I put that down as a 'Don't Know' then?"

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

"On a scale of one to ten. How happy would you say you are?"

"Since they graduated, have any of your children moved back in with you?"

"Good evening. Can I start you off with a customer satisfaction survey?"

This survey will only take five minutes and will help me improve future floods.

"Excuse me, sir - I'm conducting a survey about stress in the workplace."

Surveying.

"Mrs. Walsh? Oh, good ... you’re still alive."