Survey Fan Gifts

'If at first you don't get the survey results you want on your first survey, get mad and tear it up.'

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

'The whole floor got together and came up with a few things you could work on.'

'As you can clearly see, our profits continue to climb well into the third quarter.'

"Petting, fetching, receiving belly rubs . . . It all adds to your billable hours."

"You'd be angry, too, if your alter ego was a successful physician."

Scientists building a tower

'Still having problems finding day care?'

National Park Map

Damn. Out of quarters again for the Pay Electron Microscope.

'This guy is really good!'

"Can you spare a few bricks ... I'm learning Karate."

"You've done an absolutely fabulous job with the house, Anne, and Gordon's so improved!"

Age-salary ratio

'Love your renovations.'

'Oh, I'm sorry Frank, it's just when you come home in that outfit, sometimes I lose control... so anyways, when's dinner?'

Playing with the dog with a boomerang.

Oceanographer

Meanwhile...in Albania

Line of Old Farts Down the Middle of America

'Jimmy, what are you doing? The whole house will fall apart!'

"The applications are limitless."

'This would be a lot more fun if you didn't throw like a girl.'

Surveillance over the suggestion box.

A Cactus giving a Bulldozer driver a rude gesture as it is being knocked down for development

A horse and cart metamorphosing into a snail.

"A lot of voter's will be floating today."

"Now, in order to view this quarter's data correctly, you'll need to put on these rose-tinted glasses in front of you."

"The bar charts show out clients overwhelmingly prefer pie charts."

Confusing directions,

'My, my, don't we look fetching.'

Bird's Mimicking the Three Little Pigs,