Surreal Humorist T-Shirts

Car driving comes upon fork in road.

Man crawls in the desert see a vending machine with a sign: Mirages - Morning, afternoon, evening

Kibble Woman

Alien Abduction

Mermaid and reverse-mermaid meeting each other.

"Sorry, but 'Pop Goes the Weasel' doesn't get me in a romantic mood."

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall. Local authorities initiate a shell-ter in place in preparation for the noc-turtle invasion."

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

"Gee, thanks pal."

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

Antlers: A Deer with Ants for Antlers.

"The Eggsorcist"

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

'I don't think the employees like me.'

'He doesn't like people walking in - try crawling.'

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

"I see the White House didn't lower the flag to half staff."

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

"I'd like to buy a BOWEL."