Supporting Pillows

"Sometimes, I wish we'd never invented football."

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

Window Treatment

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

"Don't worry, darling. You'll happen."

"But why can't I bring him to class? He's my therapy toad!"

'I can validate both your feelings and your parking.'

Couple

Football supporters.

"Bees need all the help they can get Bob! Think of the consequences! No more honey for a start..."

'I don't know who I am. I have a donor heart, a donor kidney, a donor liver,a donor cornea, a donor lung...'

'Now while you're cranking the Jack in the Box Tommy, I want you to tell me your thoughts.'

"Thank you."

"I feel like my emotional baggage is permanently stuck on the luggage carousel."

"You got this, Nana."

'Good news and bad... Medical science can't cure you, but we have some marvelous support groups.'

'I'm so proud of you sweetie, you haven't smoked for a week!'

'Nurse! With this chemo cocktail, get me some mixed nuts and pretzels!'

"I'M your one call from County Lockup? Ohhhh Lenny."

'Talking to John always raises my self esteem. He's such a great listener!'

"It's a student you taught 20 years ago asking if you'd loan him bail money!"

Hedgehog Mortuary.

'Mr. Figgs - any door with doctor on it - knock-go in-smile-sit down-poor out your woes.'

Thomas was brought up by his extended family

"Should I tell her I'm a PTSD support dog specializing in disease and illegal drug scent detection?" "Should I tell him his ear's inside out?"

Patient jumps out of window.

'I'm no grey squirrel...just a very old red one.'