Super Bowl Party Pillows

'He gets confused switching channels between the World series and NFL games.'

Go Favre

"The Browns are the only team in the NFL to have a malpractice squad."

It's not a party without the Guacamole Kid.

'You're always glued to a ball game. You never want to talk about my butcher's cousin's dog.'

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Church for sports worshipers.

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

C'mon, it'll be fun! I'll throw on some stars, pop in a few planets, drum up a life form or two, and this place will be hoppin'! The Big Shebang Theory.

The trauma of losing.

Punt Cake

'No standing while room is in motion.'

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

Beers

Shaken not stirred

"I am so attracted to you right now."

Balancing two espresso martinis

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

Karataoke

"All of a dither as per usual!"

A man cheers

Movie Awards. Winner. It's been a big night for Ernie! He won three times at the movie-set caterer awards! On one set he made a healthy, refreshing beverage that received rave reviews from the cast and crew. He won the "best pitcher" award for it. Did they say he won for best costumes? No, his dressings won. His sticky buns won also. For "best leading roll" performance, right? No, for best "cinnamontography"!

Cut out and keep your own DJ.

"Honey, I think that's too many bows."

"With the prices they charge these days I can't afford to throw a pie or can off beer at the ref."

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

"Trump vs Biden. Chiefs vs 49ers. On the brink of war with Iran. Didn't we do this all in 2020?"

'We're the first film ever in HD 3-D DOUBLE D!'

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

"Whine and cheezed party."

'John is watching the game under protest.'

Super Bowl Halftime Show Barbra Streisand reads from her memoir.

"Goal!"