Sunday School Fan Gifts

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

'Court's in recess!'

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

Caution May Contain Nuts.

Overloaded with extracurricular activities, Griffin's body began to grow an extra brain to cope with it all.

"If anyone wants me, Ms. Clark, I'll be down in the youth department."

"Tia Carmen, did you ever wish summer was over...so you could be in school?"

"At this time I'd like to welcome our gold-medallion passengers on board."

"Back in my day, kids had a little respect for the law of gravity."

'We had an Old Testament skit today. Al Sims was the Hittite, and I was the hittee.'

'Are you sure we should do all this praying on Sunday? -- I thought it was God's day off.'

The chosen few

"Locusts don't sound too bad compared to spinach."

'Sorry I'm late, miss. My alarm clock overslept.'

"I think I know why you've been so stuffed-up lately."

'You're under my supervision now, principal Hodgkins!'

'Don't trust people Billy, they'll only hurt you.'

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

'It will be nice to have the words of my sermon there but it could be distracting to run football scores ... '

'I had a good share and tell, Ms. Gibbs, but my family made me sign a confidentiality agreement.'

You're being extradited to your parents.

'Is this your picture of the flight out of Egypt?'

'Lot was told to take his wife and daughter and flee from Sodom.'

'Embarrassing parents' evening is next week.'

'It's become a bit of a school tradition.'

"You must be the Pastor's kid I have heard so much about."

I don't get Diversity Day. Me either. West Fester Junior High. Everyone already obsesses over our differences. We're all equal, right? That's what they say. So why not celebrate sameness day? Where would all the diversity trainers find work?

'You mean Adam and Ever were streakers?'

'Who knocked down the walls of Jericho?'

"I can't believe it. School starts tomorrow!"

"Being homeschooled wasn't so bad except for the homemade cheerleading outfits."

"It's Billy's teacher. She's just calling to say how much she detests him."