Summertime Chef T-Shirts

'I know adding beer when barbequeing reduces health risks, but I think you're supposed to add it to the meat.'

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Squirrels Stockpiling Mulling Spices for Winter

"I've just barbecued my head again."

Sausages.

'Your fancy new grill works great. . .and we didn't even have to turn it on.'

"Isn't it great to get out of the kitchen and cook in the fresh air!"

Barbecued dessert, anyone? The coals are PERFECT now!

"Be sure and eat your frozen vegetables."

Ode to a Grill

"You like yours well done, right?"

"He won't stop and ask for directions when he COOKS, either."

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

'Dear, you can't blame this on global warming...you overcooked the fish.'

'The TZ90C with triple boosted propane burners and a titanium mesh grill with carbon fibre casings is the only way to guarantee that genuine back to nature outdoor flavour.'

"Can we set the flame to a medium high?"

'Your wife wants to know if she should get a new propane tank for the barbecue.'

'10,000 years and no one's improved on the idea of meat on a stick!'

"Gerald converted the barbecue grill to natural gas."

"Actually, it wasn't so bad. One minute I was standing in line at the slaughterhouse...The next thing I knew, I was being basted in my own juices..."

"What about the five that fell through?"

Fish flipping flapjack in pan. Title: 'Ed was glad he'd caught a panfish.'

"We get all our meat from a man dressed like a butcher."

I love the way barbecues take you back to nature.

"Who like 'em well done?"

"At first I was concerned about the Earth opening up. But I was going to build a fire pit, so it actually saved me a lot of time."

'Propane ran out.'

Dog waits for barbecue.

Where Summer Sausage Comes From...

I love the way barbecues take you back to nature.

"For keyhole turkey carving we use a 12 mm port in each flank and third in the midline."

'What we were about to receive has gone the way of all flesh.'