Successful Home Offer Pillows

"Good news, they accepted your offer!"

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

The Day Dreamer.

An exaggeration of estate agents

'We can mortgage your future for a very attractive low interest rate.'

'Floodplain close - House on stilts with ladder. Estate Agent saying, 'Welcome onto the property ladder...''

'I think you'll all rest easy knowing this is a gated community!'

Homes for sale - some assembly required.

"This neighborhood has a strong sense of community that borders on siege mentality."

Couple wanting to buy the estate agents office.

"To be honest, we were thinking of something like a Cape Cod."

'Is there anything we can do to repay you other than to repay you?'

Gay couple living together.

'I lost him in the house, but don't worry, a snake that big should be easy to find.'

Mortgages up 'Where?'

'There are no skeletons in the closets but you might have a bit of trouble with those in the back yard.'

'You're on the very bottom of the 'property ladder'. Or as we estate agents call it; 'the food chain'.'

"What do you mean our ground lease is up?"

'Now before you get all upset, I got ten percent above market value.'

'And this is the sunken living room.'

"And you thought I couldn't find Hudson River views in your price range."

'You'll need to put these on before the inspection.'

'I hope to raise enough money to buy my own house and move out at sixteen!'

'Beats the heck out of using the prime rate.'

A bank swallows a home.

"When you said you were rich, I never dreamed you were this rich!"

'Sorry, no, but thanks for bringing a little laughter into my life.'

'Empty-nesters. They're hoping to sell before the flock tries to move back in.'

Affordable homes coming soon - 'If they build these then our house will become affordable...!'

Sign reads - For Sale Still Under A Million.

'Your dream of a house with a white picket fence is still feasible, at least for the picket fence.'

'I thought I heard you rattling around.'

'We may find that there are hidden service charges with this place ...'