Home Buyer With A Twist Pillows

"One question: Do the windows open?"

'How interesting, the subdivision's built on an empty mineshaft.'

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

An exaggeration of estate agents

"Mom, could we stay in my old room until we're able to afford a place of our own?"

'We can mortgage your future for a very attractive low interest rate.'

'Floodplain close - House on stilts with ladder. Estate Agent saying, 'Welcome onto the property ladder...''

'I think you'll all rest easy knowing this is a gated community!'

"This neighborhood has a strong sense of community that borders on siege mentality."

Monopoly game - "You just gazumped me!"

Strip Mine Estates - Mineral Rights? They're All Yours.

Couple wanting to buy the estate agents office.

'If you promise to never try to open the locked attic door, the owner will take $20,00 off!'

'Is there anything we can do to repay you other than to repay you?'

"The previous tenant has gone away for a very long time."

Mortgages up 'Where?'

'A new concept. The inside out house.'

'And this is the sunken living room.'

'And every spring, a koi pond shows up in a corner of the basement.'

'Buy this house and get two wonderful neighbours!'

'You'll need to put these on before the inspection.'

"It's true that the basement's flooded, but it's stocked."

Welcome to Illusion Estates: Illusory Living At Its Best

"I don't get it. How come it's so cheap?"

'Mr. Jones? I've found a house that fits your funds perfectly! It even has a little garden!'

"I want a reverse mortgage. Take me back to when I didn't have one."

Affordable homes coming soon - 'If they build these then our house will become affordable...!'

'The owners are prepared to accept any reasonable offer.'

". . . So why, exactly, was the price drastically reduced?"

'We may find that there are hidden service charges with this place ...'

"It might have been smart to inquire about the tides before buying this seaside place"

'No windows. You wouldn't want windows in a town like this.'

"Did I mention the view?"

'It has three bathrooms and not one set of scales.'