Substitute Teachers Pillows

I'm not substitute teaching after all. How come? They wanted a criminal background check! I was a principal for 15 years. They know me! Yes, but

'I should've realized I was in trouble with a name like 'King Edward the Temp'.'

'We had a substitute today. Our teacher fled.'

"Mom, I'm losing my edge with remote learning. I've forgotten how to harass a substitute teacher!"

A Puppet Named Juan

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

How to deliver a successful presentation.

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

"I love being your agent, Nick, but the guys making the really big bucks now are the managers. Let me be your manager."

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

'No Mis Evans. You know only substitute teachers are allowed to carry taser guns!'

'If all your friends were looting and pillaging, would you do it, too?'

'You can't blame the kids for being restless when we have math teachers teaching French, and English teachers teaching science.'

'It's not for acting...It's for a testimony in a courtroom.'

'I was a substitute teacher. Former students still approach me to thank me for everything I let them get away with.'

"Every sixth grade substitute is offered an optional cyanide pill."

'No Mis Evans. You know only substitute teachers are allowed to carry taser guns!'

"The first goal of our ad hoc committee should be to learn Latin."

"While your lesson plans were perfect, and your bulletin boards were terrific...your classroom management skills need work!"

"I think I'm making progress. One of them asked a follow-up question today."

"That's excellent, Caroline!"

"A charming risk taker, who's not afraid to get bit. Boy, do I have an opportunity for you."

'It actually stands for 'substitute' but it keeps the children in line.'

We hadn't realised your body language was French....

A dragon relaxing in a chair staring at a taxidermy knight's head above his fireplace.

"Take a few minutes to introduce yourself, Ms. Berry. Not that they don't already have you pegged."

"Thanks for substituting. I left you some private notes in cursive."

The Best English Teacher in the World.

Obsolete: Any piece of software or hardware that your school brought last year for mega bucks.

'Actually, this is my vacation. I'm a substitute teacher.'

"Mrs. Martin is here. She's the new substitute teacher."

Who'll fill in while your English teacher is on maternity leave? Probably and old-bag substitute. Teach English for a couple of months? I'd love to! Umm, nana? Aren't you too old to go back to teaching? Au contraire! They don't want anyone who could possibly get pregnant. Uh-oh. Age discrimination.

"I'm sorry we couldn't give you more time off for the funeral, Sam. You know how hard it is to find a substitute."

'Hey, I heard we have a sub today!'