Subscription Service Fan Prints

"Did you join the testimony-of-the-month club?"

The Pill-of-the-Month Club!

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

Wine of the Day Club

"There's the mailman!"

"I'm sorry, your grapefruit subscription ran out and I forgot to renew it."

Mr. Macho at the game... and after the game is over.

Subpoena-of-the-Month Club

A heat wave threatens an old woman.

"Just how powerful of a fan did you put in your computer?"

Man with fake beard gets a package from the Beard of the Month club.

Letter On Its Way From Omaha To New York

After our sun sheds the last of its energy and collapses in on itself... ...after the solar systems degraded, their planets flung out and consumed... And after those billions of stars in their billions of galaxies are all slowly snuffed out one by one... ...and after the last of the supermassive black holes evaporates... A single last question will remain, drifting through the long, cosmic dark... To renew your universe, please update your payment details.

"I subscribed to a collector's magazine! It has great interviews with big-time collectors who buy the world's rarest treasures."

'Of course I just retweet everything I see - I'm a parrot.'

"Our marriage has been renewed for another season."

Heat Wave Podium

"When did Charlie switch to a subscription model?" "Sniff my butt"

Netflix Award Show

Waiter on a horse.

"I loved the part when you said I was a 'valued customer'. Do it again!"

"I'm sure it was just an oversight, sir, but your subscription to 'Time' has lapsed."

"It's not exactly shopping. Many companies have my profile, they send me stuff they know I'll like and they bill me for it."

Our bank account is now behind a paywall...

"He's been carrying out cyber attacks."

'Relax, lady, I'm out of the baby business. Now I work for UPS.

'Better add a little just to be on the safe side ? there may be another postage hike before it gets there.'

Very little fan fair.