Style Saver Gifts

'Must you get new clothes every season? I'm still wearing stuff I got years ago.'

'This is a teeny. Do you have it in a weeny?'

"Thank god I bought my layers."

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

"What the... mine are lunar eclipse glasses!"

New Suit.

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

Noise Pollution

Dress for Success suit shop: 'Can I pay you for it later, after I get successful?'

Tie Rolls

'That's the new guy. He writes our 'shuck-and-jive' press releases.'

"It's a nice halo and all, but I'm not sure it matches my outfit."

"This IS my day-to-night outfit"

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

High Pants/Low Pants.

"It's just a beginning, I suppose, but I'm feeling really good about my clothes."

Choosing What To Wear.

Murphy's Bed meets Murphy's Law.

'Now that's what I call a beautiful fit.'

"Everything I do I do with panache. I even say panache with panache."

When the traditional and contemporary services overlap.

'For sheer elegance you can't beat the black hole entropy formula.'

GURLERS

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."

Murphy bed...Murphy.

"I think your tailor has seriously miscalculated your rise, Herbert."

Cash Rebate

'We want to adopt a kid. Do you have a choice our feng shui consultant can look at?'

"When's the last time you shaved, little buddy?"

"Would you like your real size or one that artificially inflates your ego?"