Style Connoisseur Pillows

The all-swimsuit issue

"I'd like it to say 'Responsible' as well as - you know -'with-it'."

Four beds labelled modern, abstract, surreal and cartoon

FAD fashion mag: Trays on desk read: In/So Not In.

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

"Of all the buildings I've designed, it's probably the most handsome."

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

"I'll have a cup of coffee, and would you mind removing that ridiculous painting and turning off the Wilco?"

bird interprets modern art

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

'Anorak anoraks'.

Arms reach through a mirror to straighten a man's bow tie.

'No way Doug! You can not stick it to the man in new season, smart casual menswear!'

The Return Of The Minipants

'I wanted a change in decor.'

Peak Beard/High Peak Beard

"Would the gentleman care for a razor and comb to start?"

Workout clothes: 'One size fits none.'

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

"Don't say a word! Your eyes, your hair, your T-shirt, your luggage—they say it all."

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

'It's a chinstache. They were popular in the 1800's, but now they're coming back.'

'No, no....You have it all wrong!'

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

Trendies, INC

"I hope he's wearing pants."

Bald Man Overcomb

'He wears a necktie like he means it.'

"FYI – your camel hair blazer started it."

"...and we plan to offer it as a scarce and valuable product."