Study Space Schemer T-Shirts

"Someday I'd like to make this into my private study, but right now it's my wife's private study."

"Pardon me, but why is there no ceiling this office?"

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

"An Iraq attack is one thing, but I'm not sure about a Persian incursion."

"I've made myself a success through a combination of long-term planning and short term tantrums."

'Here's the game plan going forward. We acknowledge any and all 'mistakes,' then fake fixing them.'

"Do you call this a business plan?"

'Things look much better long-term, once we pass the statute of limitations.'

"I'm in big trouble. The dog ate my homework, and Dad ate my science project."

And here is where we stooped to the level of the competition.

"It's a setup."

"We're fighting them in zone A, they're our allies in zone B, and we don't know what to do in zone C."

'Oh, that's Dan, the congressman's right AND left hand man'

'No, you can't fake your own death and leave all your money to yourself.'

"Just take the free kick, and stop wasting time."

'While Dewey distracts the defense, the quarterback simply jogs into the end zone untouched.'

"We love your results. We're just a weeny bit concerned about your methods."

Old man stealing sand from a sand box for child

"Boss, there's a rumor going around that someone lost a $1,000 bill in the cafe. There are like 200 people out there." "Interesting. And I assume they're all looking for the $1,000 bill. I assume they don't want anyone else to know about it before they find it." "I assume each of them is buying our food and drink so the others won't suspect they're here with ulterior motives." "I wonder who could have possibly spread such a rumor in the first place?" "Very bad man."

'Remember to be nice to people on your way up. You might need them to do hard time for you later.'

'Why we have architects'

Basic Shelter.

"Better use the ink wedge."

"May I have your attention? For Christmas, all I want is for everyone to write a note on how smart, charming and social I am. I'm collecting college reference letters before I enter my terrible teens."

"Yes, I gave him enough rope, and NO, he didn't hang himself!"

"Well, if not now, can I have a man cave after I reach puberty?"

'Boswell, it's been brought to my attention that your hidden agenda is in direct conflict with my hidden agenda.'

"The trouble with you, sunshine, you think everything revolves around you!"

Cost of food in Cuba

"If I do that to my own Barbie, imagine what might happen to a tattle-tale."

'High interest rates won't stop me from shopping!'

COWS: Cow chess

"Taking credit for somebody else's work? Why, Ferguson – that's how I started out."