Street Scene Humorist T-Shirts

'Where have you been? It's been stuck on don't walk for the last three days!'

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

A man sees Zeus throwing lightning bolts on the balcony of his apartment.

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

A dog on the sidewalk has a 'walk me' sign, begging for a walk.

'For Sale by Neighbor'

Magic Act

Unpopular Street Signs: Go, Please Litter, Yes Parking, Garbage Collection - Sometimes Never - Mon-Fri.

Sculptor explaining to tourist in Trafalgar Square that sculpture of pigeon is called 'Retribution - it actually doubles as a giant privy!'

"Do you think those clams we ate were a little off?"

Walk, Don't Walk, Laugh.

'You can come back in, King Kong. The superintendent got the door open.'

'I'd like to get in touch with my feminine side, Joe -- bring me a Bloody Mary.'

"You know, crime doesn't pay... at least at your level."

'You got much on at the moment?'; 'No, nothing really.' (Naked man)

"Fetch and roll over weren't enough-then they sent me to philosophy classes."

"Your rose dust gets into everything, and your caladiums attract toads; and another thing: your damn marigolds are stinking up the whole area."

'He's clever alright-just watch him dry up when it's HIS round!'

The Last of the Passenger Pigeons

"It's been a rainy winter."

'Uh oh. Wax moths! There goes the neighborhood.'

Robinia Floribunda

"May I recommend the pumpkin seeds to starts?"

"Very well done, Samuels. But next time, don't forget your handcuffs."

Cook complaining to milkman

"Over here, doofus."

"Call a veterinary, chief. I think he's got a kidney infection..."

The Theatre of Mime.

"I'm not sure I can really help you. I've dealt with hundreds of rodent infestations, but I've never even heard of Beerkats!"

Manhole Warning

Witch steals a traffic man's Go sign.

"The best way of dispersing crowds in the inner city is to start handing out job applications!"

'Relax - we'll blame it on Curiosity.'