Strategic Planner Gifts

"Something about this proposed merger with Wickery Basket Company makes me nervous."

"Looks like we found the issue."

"Not the most impressive strategic plan I've ever seen."

Plan 'A', Plan 'B' - "I say we should go with plan 'A', sir."

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

"Oh no, not someone else with a mission statement."

'As part of our growth strategy we intend to build 76% more of them...as soon as we find out what they do!'

The Big Picture Department...

'And this is our strategic planning department...'

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'We tried it your way and continue to lose market share. It's time you let me take a shot at it.'

'Company Plannin Department'

"Big surprise. That cost/benefit analysis cost up more than any benefit we've ever gotten from it."

Jack and Ina build their dream house.

'Does it bother anyone else that our entire business is based on one questionable product?'

People, what a fantastic opportunity for a reset!

"The first one is actual, the second was our projection."

'The good news is we've discovered a vast new oil resource. The bad news is we need a space ship to get there.'

"This is pretty strong language, Mike. I trust you've got numbers to support it, and MOST importantly, to back-peddle away from it if we have to?"

"We'll say it's a 10 year plan. We'll all be long gone by the time they try to figure it out."

'Alright, we'll let him on the Planning Commission.'

"Ah yes… this is Mr Shipley, our new head of strategically placed objects."

"Our strategy was RIGHT, it was just that the rest of the universe didn't fit in!"

"We need someone with an overview of the situation."

"More specifically, we're looking for someone to take care of things that are bound to happen eventually."

'We've got a high staff fluctuation, that's why it's not worth furnishing the offices.'

"We've developed a five year plan that includes ample provisions for another five year plan if this one doesn't work."

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"That's Gerald, he was your predecessor as head of strategic planning."

"There goes the person that proved the Peter principal faster than anyone in history."

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"I'm Action Plan Man. Good luck finding someone to impliment it."

"After an extensive analysis of your company's strengths and weaknesses our recommendation is to give us more money."

"Hey, that's what everyone thinks about the strategic planning department! I've got a crystal ball and we all study the occult! Hah Hah Hah!..."

How judicious you are/How thin you spread it