Storytellers At Heart T-Shirts

"I'm afraid your homeowner's policy doesn't cover your house being blown down."

"Let's run away and make a new life for ourselves filled with completely different problems."

"And then the price of chocolate went through the roof. The end."

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

'Come quick, Mrs. Dumpty! Your son fell off the wall!'

"So there's this big Mother...."

'Isn't there any way I can balance the budget without moonlighting?'

'You were attacked by a raccoon? Being feral is so DANGEROUS!'

'This goes way beyond just keeping the flies off me...I'm fighting crime now too!'

"My career plans were much more exciting when I was nine."

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

Mom, there's a simple explanation for this...Aliens from outer space.

Romeo & Juliet & Ron

Eurydice is bitten by a snake

"Dammit, Pooh - don't let the heffalumps win!"

Pastries and Candy

'Are we there yet?'

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

"On New Year's Eve, Clement and I stayed up all night drinking. Tea, of course."

'You're doing a play in kindergarten?'

"Only one pailful? Did they have water restrictions like we do?"

Noah's life jacket demonstration

'He was a great writer'

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

Man takes picutre of other man holding up huge worm at Bait Shop.

Jorge Luis Borges

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

Kirsten Johnson

Three little pigs-mortgage.

'Like it? I LOVED it! The narrative gripped me from the first sentence and didn't let go until the final, heart-stopping page! And the CHARACTERS! Without question, Harris, this is the finest year-end financial report you've ever written!'