Storyteller Of Lessons Pillows

Industry and Idleness - The idle apprentice betrayed by a prostitute.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

The ghosts of Christmas yet to come.

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

'You're doing a play in kindergarten?'

'I'll give your note to my parents but our family policy is to never negotiate with terrorists.'

'A dog ate my homework.'

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

"I can't tell you how it ended. That would ruin the sequel."

"A man never stands so tall, son, as when he stoops to pick up a quarter."

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

"Simon, I'm not really interested in your juvenilia."

"Coming soon...what I did over summer vacation...the podcast!"

The Battle of the Pictures.

'Well, that brings us up to my third birthday...'

"In this life son, if you want something, you have to hunt for it."

"My report on summer vacation. . . Book and movie rights are available for $1000 each."

"Other than being sent to the principal's office, my detention, and three day suspension, school was good."

Be prepared - Don't jump to confusion.

'After the big race the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."

"Oh, great. Humble Beginnings."

'You might not know it now but I used to have some great lesson plans.'

"The quality of the writing is an embarrassment, it has no style, no fluency, no soul!"

'False alarm! I'm back. It was only a career suicide.'

"Don't think of it as being grounded. Think of it as suffering the consequences of your monumental stupidity."

'Dad, the teacher said my grades remind her of old times. She says she was your teacher too.'

'When I was a student, wireless data transmission meant passing notes in class.'

"Remember, Timmy. Anything worth doing is worth having somebody do well."

Being married is like working backstage at a magic show.