Story Chaser Pillows

'Oh-oh, headline-hunters.'

'Jump, it's a quiet news day.'

Reporter on a lead.

How to start your career as a freelance journalist

'What's the matter with you? How can we hide it from the press? We are the press!'

"We know something you don't, and you'll have to wait until 11 PM to find out!"

'We know something you don't, but you'll hav to wait until 11 PM to find out!'

"He's chasing the White Whale, as usual."

Danger-zone journalists.

First man: 'Hello, I'm Mark Clarke, 32, from Worksop, Notts.' Second man: 'Hi, Ben Henderson, 33, and this is my blonde wife Sally.' Caption: When journalists meet.

"Gentlemen, I am happy to announce that as of today we are closing down our Washington news bureau and moving the entire operation to L.A."

Reporter #3: can.

"The media is always being criticised for criticising social worker..."

Mr Jefferson Brick Proposes a Toast at the 'Rowdy Journal' Offices

Citizen journalist Rudy Park with a question. Make it quick. Are you and Cort going together to heard Sean Hannity speak? We're sharing a car. Citizen journalist Rudy Park with a follow-up. Just one. Is it a date? Come clean! The people must know! What people?

Good morning, sir, Rudy Park, citizen blogger. It's a quiet Sunday morning. Leave me in peace. Interesting. Sounds like you're hiding something! What? Do you owe back taxes? Did you take steroids? Have you filmed a music video with a scantily clad Melania lookalike, like that rapper T.I. did? Did you dress up in some weird animal costume? Was it a giraffe? I will get to the bottom of it!!! Help me out, I've got a self-imposed blogging deadline every six minutes. Sorry, pal. Local man denies besm

Remember Rudy Park, my college roommate? He just tipped me off to breaking news. Some geological disaster across the bridge. Wow. You should totally go cover that. I'm glad you think so, 'cause it wouldn't really be responsible to take a 2-year-old to a geological disaster. Could you watch my boy for a few days? On second thought, that's a boring story. Nobody wants to hear about that. He's almost potty trained. Sorry, I have a ... work ... ish thing.

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

"His exercise wheel has lost all its fascination sinces he started reading Hemingway."

"Yep, I've read this chapter before."

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

"Ah, ha! The universe IS expanding! I can't find my glasses anywhere!"

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

"Tell me again, Grandpa, about how you let your freak flag fly."

Blue Stockings

'I'm not being punished! I'm reading because I happen to enjoy reading!'

What would Charlotte Bronte do, she thought to herself.

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

The Dragon with the Girl Tattoo.

'How's this new concept? Instead of a gunfight, the hero overpowers the villian with a heartfelt homily on the sanctity of family values.'

Kid to boy in library: 'Oh, we came at the busiest part of the day ... it's a reading frenzy.'

"That was too many fresh original voices for one night."