Stock Market Sleuths T-Shirts

". . . I see P/E ratios."

Hedge funds make billions from short selling Coronavirus stocks.

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

"The economy always seems to be recovering, but it never recovers."

Investments - remember, you are what you invest in!

Will work for ETFs

'Gentlemen, we need a slogan!'

"To summarize the year: we were taken over, we took over, we were taken over and we took over."

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

A child runs an equity stand.

'The reason I like this guy's stock picks is, he's not burdened by having any experience in finance whatsoever.'

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'

"Ed and Helen's portfolio rose 3 point today on Dave's purchase of 100 shares..."

"For details on the bear market, here's a bear..."

'City Traders - The Complete Menagerie'

'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'

'Not feeling well? Don't be silly - your EKG has outperformed the Dow.'

"Cheer up, if this carries on we could become a very attractive takeover target.

Dow Jones drop

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

'Greenspan said today the alert staus for the possible interest rate has been reduced from orange to yellow.'

Smiling businessman with rising profits

'Better brace yourself. It looks as though your broker's now equipping your monthly statement with crumple zones.'

Economy Slows: 'It's still too fast for me.'

Jumping Wall Street.

"We're always excited to hear from analysts who are bullish on the market."

...I wonder who started the rumour of your resignation?

Worried man looking at stock market chart on his computer screen with office party going on in the background.

"Some guy by the name of Bernanke called in. He wants to try and make an emergency soft landing."

Symbols of Wall St: bull, bear, Humpty Dumpty.

"Elon Musk is buying rope and walnuts."

'I've never seen a stock crash so hard.'