Stock Market Satire Fan T-Shirts

'Evil' rose 3 points today...'Good' dropped 2.5...

'Bit of a staffing problem, Boss. We haven't got any left.'

'Blast it, Peterson -- What's this I hear about you letting our profits trickle down?'

'Why can't they call it a deer, or a squirrel market?'

"They've made these fund prospectuses much easier to read." Brochure states; 'Give us all your money and get lost."

'We're all right as long as they think we're taking millions.'

"Greetings, Earthling - Are you a worker or a drone?"

'I wonder how the economy is doing.'

Greek Crisis

Exchange Rate Going Down the Plughole

The Contrarian funds

'Give me something that will restore my faith in Equities . . .'

'I thought time was supposed to be money!'

IRS: The country is broke, but your taxes cannot be construed as 'Charity to the Poor'.

'It's like a bull market, only not as aggressive. It's more like a steer market.'

'I blame Iceland - it's PAYBACK!'

'I today's market news, Greed roared back.'

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

'In today's market news, losers outnumbered those who were wiped out.'

I think I can explain what happened to your investment, with the use of this simple chart.

Golden bubbles

"Cold drinks" "Tesla stock"

'On Wall Street, both stocks and bonds dropped on news that adversity is good for the soul.'

'...But the good news is your old Enron stock has become a high-priced collectible!'

'I can't believe it! This is when I sent out a company memo advocating a win-win philosophy.'

'And then the bad man from the Securities and Exchange Commission and I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house down!'

'We've had a marginal advance-decline on a near-term buy-out, but no one knows if that translates as a downturn or an up-tick.'

"Humpty Dumpty had a great fall? Was he invested in emerging markets?"

'Stocks gyrated today on news life is full of suprises.'

The truth about the death of the Dinosaurs.

'Your investments in sub prime mortgages have become collectors items now! Aren't you excited?'

'Polly wants a Nasdaqer...Polly wants a Nasdaqer...'

'I'm calling my invention 'IPO'.'

'It's a deal, for $15 an hour, I'll stand in front of your office.'

'I called you in here because your expenses and contributions appear to be quite elaborate!'