Stick-chasing Storyteller T-Shirts

"Did you hear about the dog that ran 100 miles just to retrieve a stick?"

I should be a writer when I grow up...

Swan Fairy Tales

The Demise of Tinkerbell

J. R. R. Tolkien

'My 'What I Did Over The Weekend' report is about my hunting a 17,000 pound moose, deep inside Canada.Some or all of this report has been fictionalized for dramatic purposes.'

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

'Who I played in Summer Stock.'

I wonder what kind of wizard or vampire my husband will be

Canine conundrum.

'I'm sorry but my little boy, Jack, ruined them all today.'

'...and when the wolves moved house I was adopted by beetles.'

My Spam Sketchbook

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

"It doesn't say, Son, whether or not Noah wore a captain's hat."

Daughters at Bedtime

"You're using the boogeyman as an excuse to shut me out."

"Another slander suit!"

Santa's Helpers

'I can't remember the title, but it began, 'Once upon a time'...'

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

The Battle of the Pictures.

Library. Story Hour. This fact-checking site says no cow has ever jumped over the moon.

'Just thirty-five years until I can run for office!'

I get my ideas on sale...

"Mr. Swinehart has just crossed Route 36 at Goshen Junction. We are all expected, in exactly eighteen minutes, to greet him as he comes down the driveway."

'I'm sorry, but I can't let you on board unless there's a Mrs Bigfoot.'

Master of the Universe meets the sugar plumb fairies

'Bridges falling down, killer pumpkin eaters...'

'Can you tell me where James Herriot lives?'

"Old Jack Frost nipping at your nose, eh?"

Mommy and I are back from New Zealand. How was your trip? It was great. I got to see where the Hobbits lived. And there was green everywhere. Then we had to go. They wouldn't grant you and your mom refugee status? No. We tried Antarctica after that. We tried real hard to fit in. But the penguins just would not accept us as part of their society. Tell your mommy Trump's only going to be president for eight short years.

"Today no one, and I mean no one, could get the sneakers out of my mouth..."

'Who needs a measuring tape when you've got an imagination?'