Step-child Gifts

"Thanks, Mom. Thanks, Kevin. I had a very nice time."

Going into the relationship, Tom knew Loretta was a package deal.

Lady asking her fiance's son if she can be his new mother.

'Hi, I'm Bob and I'll be your waiter ... and this is my wife, Susan, and her two children from a former marriage, Jimmy and Cindy.'

"We penguin fathers are the greatest!!!..."

"I'm bilingual. I can talk to parents and step parents."

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies.'

Couple with lots of kids. Woman says: 'This is our daughter, my son from my first marriage, John's daughter from his second marriage, and I've no idea who the one on the end is.'

'The only game my Dad knows is playing possum.'

Mom's Diner - Thanks for not talking about your father.

"The bagel’s from a previous marriage."

Base camp for Ed and Janet Wilson's courageous attempt to scale Mt. Blended Family.

Child on a schedule.

'Until I met your Mom, yes.'

"That's my mum and her boyfriend's the one next to my dad who's behind his girlfriend next to his second wife, just behind my mums first husband."

Mr. Dombey introduces his daughter Florence

'Don't take it too hard, Dad, Mr. Hodes down the street is just having a great year.'

'You can't tell me what to do! You're not my 'ruler'! Heck, you're not even my real dad!'

A kid like me needs a dad like you! You know. Someone to post bail.

Quick Response Forces at East 89th Street

"We've found your birth mother."

'Wow...nice job of bluffing with reverse psychology, Victoria!. . . Um. . . You were bluffing right?'

"I'll clean my room when I want. I don't have to listen to you. You're just my step ladder."

"Now that we've got a new bull, is he the calve's stepfather?"

'Hi! New daddy!'

'It must have belonged to Mom before she married Dad. He calls it his step-ladder.'

'Shall we have a small family Alfred? - I've got 10 kids from my first marriage!'

"We need a bigger place for my kids and his kids and our kids."

"What about instead of your stepdad, you just think of me as a 'gritty reboot'."

'I see it as an adventure Joe...and the best adventures are the ones that challenge you...Ah...and this would explain your collection of hazmat suits.'

'Just because your father and I have decided to get married doesn't mean we love you any less.'

"Good evening. I am Martha's son by a previous marriage."

"Mom's new boyfriend wants to take me tropical beach fishing."