Steering Wheel Whiz T-Shirts

"You were recommended by Eastern Driving School."

The first car accident.

'I think he's doing ok, the coach says he has the attention span of a goldfish.'

Math Teacher

It appears to be some sort of computer virus.

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

The Invention of the Wheel

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

"You're right. I have to come up with a brake of some kind."

Man on a unicycle trying to guard credit from nasty 'Bankruptcy'.

'I need both hands for steering.'

A2+B2=C2, 'Are you sure you're not just making this stuff up?'

"I'm recommending more video games. I'm worried about his hand eye coordination."

'Hey! -- I invented that, too!', 'It's that nut Al-Gor again.'

'This is just the first step -- next, I invent the Teamsters' Union!'

"We can't just pluck figures out of the air any more. . . We use a bucket."

Psychic car mechanics.

'So Roger, how's your invention going?'

"Bangin’ rims. Sears?"

Millipede motorist

First Speeding Fine.

"It's a nice invention, but what about GRIDLOCK?"

'Excellent Hoskins, you've got all the right numbers, now shall we see if you can put them in the right order?'

"Your orders are burning up the system. I love it!"

Useless car accessories.

'And this is where we attempt to forecast the true size of the spending cuts!'

"Maybe we should stop making them on a hill."

I love Pottery.

'This damn ??,' - 'So that's computer language,'

"Yes, my automatic starter has the technology to start your car as well. I'll show you. Honey! Go start her car!"

Uses for the wheel (hula hoop).

"I crunched the numbers and now they're so smooshed up I can't read them."

"I realise children are learning to use computers at an early age, but this is outrageous!"

'I invented them yesterday and Junior already has them souped up.'