Start Of The School Year Gifts

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

"You know what school needs? - A fast forward button!"

As the summer drew to a close, Mrs. Bank's back-to-school nightmares progressed from a class of her worst students, to a class of their parents.

"What I did this summer."

Back To School In Kansas...

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

My First Camera

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

School Cafeteria. It's the start of the school year. The Geometry teacher will come by to verify that we're serving truly square meals. The grammar teacher says the alphabet soup is runny and needs some punctuation added. History teachers keep a record of all the past meals and so will notice any leftovers being served. And the computer lab staff expressed concern about all the cookies so the astronomy teacher suggested switching to candy for dessert. I'll bet she thinks Starburst and Milk

'Remember, Edward, inside every 'F' student is a 'D' student trying to get out.'

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

'This has been a drill. Had this been an actual test you would have been instructed...'

"Eventually, you have to stop visualizing yourself doing well on the test, and actually do the test."

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

"No, I really thought each sentence ended with an emoji!"

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

A resourceful girl, Cynthia hoped to get credit in both Earth Sciences and Culinary Arts with her ozone layer cake.

Today we learned to count to one.

'When I asked you to do research for your assignment, I meant the library not on Google!'

'I'm supposed to take a geography test and I can't find the right room!'

Evil Exams!

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

The best PE teacher in the World.

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'

"When I grow up, I don�t know whether to be a stunt amn or a train driver"

"I lost my taste for his homework when it came burned on a CD."

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

'I'd like to challenge the test.'

'I don't like the sound of the engine.'

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

"I've outgrown my backpack."