Star Of The Show Prints

'Me me me meeeeeeee...' How singers become self-centered.

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

Showbiz Awards

'It's one of Larry King's earliest shows.'

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

Adam and Eve on a Talk Show

Fishermen

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

'Very funny!'

"Good evening several times and welcome to QI. As usual I'll be asking a series of quite interesting questions and some comedians will be doing a lot of knob and fart gags. It's a winning formula!" "Don't knock it. No one likes knockers!" "Speak for yourself!" "Was that an entendre? I'll have a double." "Mine's a large one!"

"Hang in there everyone—we promise a cute animal story at the end."

Coming up: Bush and Kerry will debate on 'saturday night live'...and whoever gets the most laughs will be the winner.'

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

"... And in Canada today ... nothing happened."

'We'll have to end it there, I'm sorry - we're running out of time.'

'The inaugural address? It's sort of like an opening monologue.'

Astrological forecasts of the rich and famous

The girl who has everything...

'...And now, stay tuned for 'America's Funniest Presidential Debates'!'

'I'm not sure how you managed to burn a bowl of cereal.'

TV SALES, 'Will the violence chip block out Glenn Beck?'

"Hello, and welcome to 'Homes Under the Hammer. . .'"

And now, for a rebuttal.

Nick Offerman

"Accepting for..."

How to get on talk shows by promoting your new book