Stage Survivor Pillows

'I like the way you handle responsibility, Mac, so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

'They all want to play the star.'

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

Evil Exams!

Acme. Breakable prop transporter.

Woman crying with happiness.

"Does my bum look big in this aria?"

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

'For heaven's sake, Lois, when are you going to give up this mad dieting of yours?' (woman falls through drain).

'After years of practicing in empty theaters, Horace's dream of becoming a soft-shoe dancer seemed as remote as ever.'

Spiro & Pusho illusionists

'Incredibly Inexpensive Sound Engineers. Pretty Good Sound Engineers, 12 the price, 23 the quality. You'll hardly notice the occasional feedback.'

Mensa Does Improv

'This towel is wet so I'll subtract fourteen pounds.'

Waving from Behind the Curtain

E=Emcee Squared

Cleaner cleaning under the feet of the dancers as they perform

"Take my advice; speak softly but carry a big shtick."

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

'I got a good place in my exams today. Right next to the radiator.'

"Thank you, Mr. Mulvaney, but what we're really looking for is someone with talent."

'I'm a star!'

Dieting Motivation.

'We had to donwsize.'

Chekov play and scorecard,

'I saw an offbeat play the other night. No one took off their clothes.'

TV stage door

'Most of all, I'd like to thank god. . .'

Performance In The Bedroom

"Homework! Homework! Homework! I'll be doing this for hours! Talk about a misspent youth."