Stage Shows Pillows

'Please do not try this at home, unless you have a strong alibi and a brilliant lawyer.'

Pickleball, the Musical

'Joe the Plumber' The Musical.

An Early Ventriloquist Meets His Future Dummy

Ventriloquism For Beginners

'He's a cheat I tell you - it's just a trick!'

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

'Hurry it up, will you? We're on in five minutes!'

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

Which was the false leg, even to this day is still a closely guarded secret.

'Sheep striptease'.

Spiro & Pusho illusionists

"Those who can can, dance."

"Our next act...Cruzini, the world's greatest magician!"

Theatre Crowd

"Just be yourself."

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

Pirate

"And this song goes out there to any girl who might consider sleeping with me."

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

Fish, singing: 'I'm a sole man..'

Modern Major General

Scarpia from Tosca

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

"To save time, I'll just mention the people I’m not thanking."

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."

Tina Turner

'After years of practicing in empty theaters, Horace's dream of becoming a soft-shoe dancer seemed as remote as ever.'

"For my next trick, I'll need a volunteer, a fake knife, and a mirrored box with a secret compartment."

"Squirting flower, squirting flower...."

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

Magic Tricks

Ralph Rackstraw HMS Pinafore

'This marriage is turning into a complete farce.'

Midsummer Night's Dream