Stables T-Shirts

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Use the body brush vigorously - he will enjoy it.

A very young man being hired as a groom.

Groom teling visitors about an erratic horse

'You must be the new guy! welcome to riding club buddy!'

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Horsekeeping - No. IX

'Somebody's got to be kidding,'

'He says not to panic because horses have lots of blood...'

'I can't stand to see an animal in pain....'

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Horsekeeping - No. X.

Stable boys and Scottsman

'...and what do doctors recommend for pain?'

Never clip him yourself unless you are an expert.

"I had no alternative Mr. Prendergast. Your daughter fell and broke her leg."

'So....how many hours were you practising half pass this morning?'

"I preferred the name 'Merrylegs'."

'Mom, I think it's time I graduated to a full size horse.'

'I don't set the rules, but you do need to accept that you're a pony and move on Brian!'

'Of course there is room for advancement. You certainly can't go down from here.'

"I used to be a racer: Giving people joy-rides is really really boring..."

"Boy, this is the life: For a bit of riding every day, we get fed, pampered and groomed..."

Having asked for some 'bruisers' to bruise oats for feeding horses, Mr. Haycock gets sent the 'Whitechaple Chicken' and the 'Bayswater Slasher'

Oat Cuisine in Horse's Nosebag

Horse Muzzles

'I've fallen and I can't giddyup.'

'The holes in this hay net are getting smaller! What are you trying to say buddy?!'

How's your job at the stables? -I'd better dash my work is piling up!

'My mother was a race horse. My father was a stablehand who got five years for sodomy.'

'You can tell the age of a horse by the teeth...but who wants to bite a horse.'

'It was wishful thinking when they called me 'Flash': I've never won a race in my whole life...'

"I carry burdens, yes.....but I certainly don't consider myself a beast."

"I think I'll call the new foal Bill. . .He's due at the end of the month."

'Meadow fescue, meadow grass and perennial ryegrass! This is going to be the best party ever!'

The new groom is a very young boy who says he ought to understand horses because he has been amongst them all his life

'...explain to me again why you are burying the shoe you threw..'